


the last star to lead us

by snackmon (sashimini_central)



Category: Starlight Brigade
Genre: Brian has trust issues, Character Study, Gen, Mild Language, Platonic Relationships, based off the music video, it's headcanon time babey, made-up names for alien species, they/them pronouns for Strive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-04
Updated: 2019-06-04
Packaged: 2020-04-07 12:31:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19085092
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sashimini_central/pseuds/snackmon
Summary: Ninja Brian decides that the Starlight Brigade's newest member is too much of a loose end. It's not exactly his fault that he feels no trust for the kid or isn't ready to follow them as easily as the others. After all, he just isn't used to using the stars to navigate the darkness anymore.





	the last star to lead us

**Author's Note:**

> The Starlight Brigade MV just hit me hard in almost every single space and storytelling aesthetic that I appreciate. It was a work of art and I wanted to illustrate a love letter for it, which is a drawing you can find [here.](https://snackmon.tumblr.com/post/185351485892/please-click-this-for-better-quality-tumblr-is)  
> This story goes hand in hand with the illustration, working as a prequel of sorts.

 

 

 

Brian had been watching them for a while now, ever since that first flight when Sung picked up the signal of another star-ship nearby.  
Delicate features, a small but pointy nose, long eyelashes, hair that floated stubbornly against the artificial gravity of the mothership.  
Compared to the rest of them, Strive was small, so tiny, so easily crushed by the weight of the universe.

 

Yet they stood strong. Shone like the stars that Brian hadn't seen in twenty-something years. 

 

And it was upsetting.

 

Also, it was also getting kinda creepy, Brian decided, to watch the sleeping _child_ from across the room while he sharpened his knives.  
Not that he would've minded creepy, that was his entire m.o. after all!  _Ninja Brian, he'll watch you in your sleep and then stab you to death because it's fun,_  and all that...  
However, something about Strive unsettled him and, unable to figure out what, the feeling became a nagging pressure behind his temples instead.

 

A small sigh left the young one's lips as they buried deeper into the thin blanket, nothing but a small figure in one of the dark sleeping quarters' lower bunks.

 

Setting the knife in his hand down onto the side table with much more force than the gesture really needed, Brian abandoned his place on Sung's bunk and walked himself out of the room -without glancing at Strive once more, to his own credit.

 

It was time to stop this senseless thing.

 

Voices drawled over from the main area, pointless conversations flowing through the confined hallways during the late evening. 

 

All of the others were still up and around. On their downtime there wasn't much else to do than talking, playing and planning future battles. There had been nothing but regular training flights in their schedule recently.

 

Only Strive had been exhausted to the bone after docking back onto the mothership and letting the adrenaline seep out of their veins. They'd been almost entirely asleep over dinner and-  
No, he needed to get this out of his head, needed to get the kid out of his sight.  
Strive was too much, something about them too present in each of their minds to keep the old team dynamic running. 

 

Hissing through his teeth, Brian sped down the small flight of stairs and into the main area.  
No time wasted, his strides long, Brian made right for the table across from Sung and placed his palms menacingly on the glowing surface.

 

"The kid needs to go."

 

All eyes on him. He had the undivided attention of the other four in the room now.

 

"Excuse me, what?" Meouch was the first to find his words again, fangs viciously glinting in the electric blue that set the whole room aglow.

 

"I'm talking to Sung, not you, kitty. Sung made the decision to let the kid stay. He will tell the kid that they need to go." Brian brought his arms up, crossing them in front of his chest.

 

"And why is that?" Sung asked, any malice towards the previous demand carefully removed from his voice.

 

"You've seen them today," Brian scoffed, blue eyes a piercing glare through the hole in his mask.

 

Sung was anything but intimidated by him, "I don't see your point. Strive is an excellent pilot, much more nimble and swift than any of us could ever dream to be."

 

"They're too reckless. Dodging a few asteroids on a training flight does no good if they almost ram into Phobos."

 

"Remember when Hogan first came with us and none of us were used to flying with a ship that big on the team? We've been a mess before and all you've ever done is glower at us from a corner," Sung leaned onto his elbows and forward over the tabletop, "So what is this really about, Brian? What do you hold against the kid to try and kick them out of the team?"

 

Cold anger seeped deeper into Brian's bones. How could he even make a point to a group of people that Strive had so utterly wrapped around their little finger that they'd forgive and forget anything?  
"The kid's a problem, you gotta see that. They're young and too lanky. A weak link. Next to the rest of us, they look like an ant next to a mooneater. Not that you know what an ant is, but take my word, they're fucking tiny. They've never been off-planet before this either. And they got those... sparkly eyes and soft cheeks, no way they'll survive this suicide mission we're on. This is-"

 

"Hold on a tick, is this what I think- I mean, shit, Brian, are you really?" Phobos spoke up and the way his voice was laced with unbridled amusement made Brian want to kill. Him specifically. But also everyone there in general.

 

Phobos made eye-contact with Hogan across the table, the silent head-tilt of the robot serving as the inquiry that would get him to keep talking. "Our Ninja-guy feels some feelings. Admit it Bri-dude, you're protective of the kid! You're dreading that Strive could get hurt or even bite the star dust and it'll be our fault for letting them come along."

 

Annoyance, or perhaps something closer to boiling blood-red anger spiked through Brian's veins. 

 

Care and protectiveness, feelings and worry...  
No, this team was made of hardened space explorers and ruthless outcasts. There was no time for anything past camaraderie.  
To suggest that Strive's uncalloused hands, soft cheeks and lack of scars marring his skin suddenly woke things Brian hadn't felt since he left his home behind...

 

Meouch opened his maw before Brian had any chance to follow that line of thought down the rabbit hole.  
"I've been thinking about it as well, if I'm totally honest. We can show Strive the ropes as much as Strive can do their best to channel their unbridled joy for flying into speeding their butt out of a fight alive. They definitely got the spunk to succeed in unpredictable battle situations. Got the determination to see all the stars back in their rightful place across the galaxies, too."  
Only a deep sigh hinted at how weary the thought about the younger one's involvement in their mission really was. "But they're still years behind in experience, and sometimes I see them barely miss a beam fired at them and well... with how soon we're going to have to fly this mission, will they really be ready?"

 

"I won't let you down! I promise!"

 

Everybody whirled around, over to the entrance of the hallway.

 

Strive stood there, on bare-feet and still wrapped in their blanket, hair aglow under the blue light of the room's many screens.  
Something painful settled onto their face. "I know I'm the new guy here, but please trust me to train as hard as I can, thrice as hard if you think I can't shape up with the rest of you yet."

 

And when Brian looked at them then, the pain in Strive's expression pulled everything he had tried to bury to the forefront of his mind.  
He knew that sadness in their eyes, seen it before in eyes of people he once upon a time called family. That he once called friends. 

 

It was an unsure sadness like _I'm sorry I wasn't good enough_.  
A lost sadness like _Please don't leave me behind_.  
A grieving sadness like _I miss the night sky so much, so much._

 

But Strive put a twist on it, melted the cold sadness and turned it into determination.

 

"Hey, nobody ever said you have to work yourself 'til you drop," Sung raised a placating hand in their direction, "How long have you been standing there anyway?"

 

"Uhm. I woke when someone was kinda loud." A nervous glance in Brian's direction. _Well then.  
_Frantically they added, "But I also was thirsty, that's why I got up in the first place."

 

Sung let out a sigh, "Listen, kid. Don't read too much into what you heard, okay? You're new to the team and we're all weary bastards from all the way across the universe. It's in our nature to doubt first, doubt second, keep distance third, have some more mistrust fourth and then somewhere along the line we realize that you've been a member of the crew all along." A grin followed, "You work plenty hard enough already!"

 

Suddenly, Hogan moved past them all, stretching out one of his spindly robotic arms with a silent mechanical hum. With no hesitation, he plucked Sung's warm mug off the table and nudged it towards Strive in a peace offering.

 

Unperturbed by the petty theft in front of him, Phobos added, "Take it easy, kid, I know it's hard trying to find your place in a group that's thick as thieves like us. But if you just go with the flow you'll automatically start feeling like you belong way sooner than you think."

 

"Yeah," Meouch rumbled with a deep purr lacing his voice, "Maybe you'll run Sung out of his leading position and before we all know it you'll fly peak of the formation when we rescue the stars, wouldn't that be something?"

 

A small smile snuck its way onto Strive's face. Content with the tension melting away a cheeky tone appeared in their voice, "Better watch out, Sung, I'm coming for you."

 

Sung returned the grin, playfully slamming his fist onto the table. "Hah, it'll be fun to see you try. You got much to learn! Better tackle it with all of that firestorm in your heart." 

 

"I will!" On silent feet, Strive slipped back into the shadow of the hallway, contently sipping on Sung's stolen mug. Almost out of eyesight they called back behind them, "Good night everyone."  
The energy left behind in the room hummed happily, the entire crew sitting together in a mood brighter than it had been in months.

 

Brian grit his teeth. 

 

_I will,_ Strive had promised so easily.  
_You'll fly peak of the formation,_  Meouch had joked in good nature.

 

But Brian had watched them all and he realized that, almost naturally, Strive would go wherever they needed to go, the light over their chest burning brighter with every step they got closer to their goal to see the sparkling night sky again.  
And like the northern star back on his home planet, all the others would follow Strive without questioning the direction they took. 

 

But Brian hadn't seen the northern star back home in nearly three decades. And he hadn't seen any star at all in a good two-thirds of that time.

 

And maybe, just maybe, in all this darkness Brian had forgotten that stars were something brilliant and untouchable, but also inescapable once you were in open space.  
They weren't things you could hide away from, nor could you shelter them from the world.  
They were just out there, a whole firestorm within themselves.

 

And, so far, only one thing had been able to do something about their existence.

 

How powerful must the one star that never vanished be, if it was here now, walking the halls of their mothership and softening the hearts of this rag-tag bunch of space vagabonds?

 

Maybe Brian was protective, as to not lose that starlight all over again.  
Maybe he was scared.  
Maybe he should just stop thinking about it. He'd be caught dead admitting to it anyway.

 

If it was too late to make Strive leave, then all that was left was watching them burn.  
Whether it was as a star or in the wreck of a starship was yet to see.

 

 

 

゜｡･*.°☆   ━━━━━   ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ

 

 

 

Day by day, Brian observed as Strive crawled into the cockpit of their small starship and twirled through the empty void of space as if a whole horde of rabid nactresc was on their tail.

 

Week by week, he sat by as the crew gathered around them like moths to a flame. Adoration and excitement for their improvement clear on their faces.

 

He watched Strive giggle together with Phobos as they set up a prank in the main hallway, and then scatter across the ship in panic as it was Hogan of all people -well, robots- to walk into the trap. 

 

He watched as Meouch threw them up in celebration when after all the hard training a bit of definition started to show on their formerly thin biceps, and then threw them nose-first into the ceiling lights. 

 

And he watched as suddenly, Strive proposed an alternative to Sung's plan for a small rescue mission that would not only buy them time but also make sure the refugees were as far from the danger as possible.

 

Strive was starting to find their place within the crew, just as Phobos said they would. And somehow that put them out on the battle front-lines.

 

It was torture and frankly, Brian had never been a good sleeper with insomnia to keep him up at odd hours of the night, but by now it was getting ridiculous.

 

A few months down the road, Brian found himself in the storage hold of the ship. It was in the late hours of his night-watch and he was throwing the third knife in a row slightly off-kilter from the bulls-eye of his target.  
Frustrated, he lobbed the fourth one right after it, missing entirely this time.

 

However, before he could go to retrieve his knives, a hum woke the resting ship up.  
A hum from the landing dock, to be precise.

 

Quickly, he pulled out two of the knives from his training target and rushed out of the room, towards the landing dock.

 

"Are you shitting me," he grumbled as he walked out into the control room, to see the air-lock closing and Strive's ship nowhere to be seen.  
Activating the screens only proved to agitate him more, because Strive's starship was currently descending onto the small uninhabited planet they'd been orbiting for the night.

 

Filled with sudden dread, Brian decided against going to fetch one of Strive's more reasonable babysitters (Sung or Meouch) and just dealing with this by himself: "Kid, what are you doing?"  
Brian's voice was ice-cold and he spoke as soon as the communications screen popped up.

 

Strive let out a squeak of surprise, looking shocked before they tried to cover it up by coughing and wearing an expression halfway between determined and guilty. "I'm going down there to fly another round. I know I messed up today, it was my first time flying in an environment with such strong gravity and I did bad. So I'm doing it again until I get it right."

 

Brian clicked his tongue. Leave it to the kid to be smart as all hell but only know "head first through the wall" as a method to get from A to B.  
"If I remember correctly, you messing up today gave you a sprained ankle. I also remember Sung taking a look at it and telling you to rest it."

 

"It doesn't hurt much anymore. If I wanna catch up until we reach the Star Thief, I need to push myself further. We don't know what's inside that giant triangle anyways, so if there's something I can't do..." On screen, Strive worried their bottom lip with their teeth.

 

Brian sighed which kind of seemed to be a thing that he did way more often now. "Kid, listen. You need to-."

 

"Stop. Calling me 'kid'. I don't know how fast your species ages, but for mine, I'm already well considered an adult. A young one, yes, but not young enough that I need someone to tell me what I need all the time."

 

"You are a kid if you can't even listen to me. I'm coming down there with you. So don't do some other stupid shit before I'm there."  
_You are a fool for not keeping your distance, Ninja Brian,_ were the words left unsaid.

 

"You'll come? And help me train?" The bafflement was so blatantly visible in Strive's face. Of all things, a peace offering from Ninja Brian had been the last thing they'd expected to get tonight.

 

"Yeah, I'll come. The other morons always underestimate your peanut with wings, especially in heightened gravity. They won't be able to give you pointers for high-speed flight and physics as I will." Brian climbed up into his own ship, shutting the latch and activating the mechanism that would seal off the dock and let him lift off into space.

 

It was no three minutes later when he approached Strive's current position.  
He kept an eye on the young one over the open communications line, watching them twitch nervously, but definitely delighted.

 

"We start on my command. We'll just fly in between the rock formations. This isn't space, so you can't go at full speed and you gotta watch for centrifugal force during your turns." Brian found himself way more patient during the explanation than he'd expected. "It's like being more stable on your feet after you've walked through sand. You do well here, you'll have a better feeling for it up on zero gravity."

 

"Got it!"

 

And with that Brian just forced the control levers of his ship forward, leaving Strive behind in the dust with an affronted, "I thought you said 'on your command'!?"

 

Strive did better now than they had during the day, minding his corners more and doing a better job adjusting for his wing-span.

 

Flying around the stone pillars and below rocky overhangs, Brian realized that he had to push his ship to keep up with the kid. 

 

He used to be the fast one of the team, the others never able to match his speed.  
Over his years with the Starlight Brigade, Brian had been decoy and flanker, a job he enjoyed occasionally but put him too much in the center of attention for his tastes.  
Brian was swift, silent and deadly. He preferred to attack from the blind spots and get out before people knew he was there.

 

And then there was Strive, shining brightly every time Brian caught sight of their ship through the metallic blue of the planet's mountains.  
Strive who surged forward with no fear, glad to put their life on the line for justice and smart as a whip to know exactly what they were good at.

 

Weaving through the terrain, Brian found himself following that silver tail of Strive's ship, the light of that twinkling star they carried on their chest.

 

It had been scary, to follow something Brian had put no trust into in almost two decades.  
But like the appeal of stargazing, there was mirthful peace here now.

 

Suddenly Brian remembered, so many nights ago and a few dozen moons away, when he had stood in the main area of the mothership filled with anger.  
And Strive had lingered in the doorway, longing for a place where they could belong among the team.  
(There also had been some sappy thoughts about the north star and back home that Brian wouldn't even admit to if you threatened to torture him.)

 

But he'd been right back then, they'd all follow Strive one day, no matter where they'd go.  
He just never thought he would. Without even thinking about it much, Brian had fallen in place to chase after them as well.

 

A yelp drew him from his thoughts and he barely caught sight of Strive's ship nicking a protruding rock with its wing.

 

"Strive. Status," he demanded, watching intently on the screen as the younger one composed themselves, holding their possibly ringing head in their hands.  
A short silence followed and when Brian got no answer, he directed orders instead, "We're going back up to the ship."

 

"No, no, I'm fine. I got it."

 

"Are you hurt?"

 

"No."

 

"I said. _Are. You. Hurt_."

 

"You know, maybe the others weren't all wrong when they told me you secretly care about me." Strive did that thing where their smile was a genuine one but their voice held all the mischief of a trickster.

 

"Stop talking and start flying again if you're okay enough to run your mouth. I'm not gonna coddle you, I've decided." Brian leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms and refused to watch Strive on the screen to his left.

 

"Oh, were you undecided before?"

 

He decidedly hated this. It was insufferable.

 

"You little shit, I'm gonna fire at you. Try to dodge this!"

 

"What?!" With a frantic yell, Strive yanked his controllers sideways, barely missing the beam and twirling into a barrel roll. "Brian!"

 

"I like this type of training. When the drones try to keep us from getting into the Star Thief, dodging is a skill you'll sorely need!"

 

"Oh, you're on!"

 

And with another rotation of his controls, Strive shot up into the blank night-sky, with Brian and his lasers hot on his tail.

 

Later, they would rush back before the ship's system determined it time for the rest of the crew to get up.  
They'd land their ships and Brian would ruffle Strive's anti-gravity hair as he walked past. The younger one trailed after him with a brilliant expression of joy and relief on their face.

 

None of the others ever knew they were gone that night.

 

 

 

゜｡･*.°☆   ━━━━━   ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ

 

 

 

Phobos insisted that a good mission planning session couldn't work without good food and sugary drinks, even though the guy never touched any of it himself.  
Those demands now found them all around the table in the main room, cookies and soda cans taking up so much space that it would make actual mission planning a damned ordeal. Meouch and Strive had managed to get crumbs all over the place before they even started.

 

"I'm saying we should at least check it out!" Strive pointed down at the emergency video message on the table's interface before them. "This Arin guy seems desperate enough and he and his friends could use a hand defending their sector. It's close-by, three days if we fly through our night times."

 

"Strive your drink!" Sung appeared on their left side with a steaming hot mug of the same drink Strive had snagged from him that night so many months ago. A friendly hand was laid around the younger one's shoulder. "Good job on the red star extraction plan, by the way. Hogan and I had no troubles getting out whatsoever!"

 

"Most of that was your work! I'm just glad everyone got out safely!" The smile on Strive's face widened at the praise, the glow of the star on their chest had flared up in kind. 

 

They shone so brightly these days. Or maybe Brian just hadn't noticed it this intently before.

 

With a huff, he leaned back in his chair.  
Looking at Strive across the table now, with them so at home in their midst, Brian found himself almost contemplating something stupid. 

 

Like offering to switch bunks so they could have the top bunk instead like they used to have back home.  
Or insisting to teach them a few tricks with a knife so they could defend themselves outside of their ship as well.  
Or maybe even asking them to stay with the Starlight Brigade forever, even after this was over.

 

Brian frowned deeply. The kid really had gone and wormed their way into his murderous heart.  
He deemed that a recommendable feat in itself.

 

Brian had acknowledged it before but vehemently refused to fall victim to it until that nightly training session weeks ago. That entrancing light that Strive seemed to radiate naturally.

 

But now here they were.

 

Strive flew top of the formation and all the others followed them unconditionally. Rescue and retrieve missions became more common, the younger seemingly gravitating towards places where people lost hope. 

 

Strive often told those they rescued what they were truly aiming for, planted a seedling of hope in their hearts that the great Starlight Brigade would return the night sky to its former beauty.

 

And Brian watched how people looked at them with the longing of stargazers that had been in the dark too long.  
If only Strive would look down and see the same as everybody else. If only they'd realize that they had the one surviving star always above their heart.

 

Brian scoffed.  
Truly, it was almost lost irony that they had the last shining star among them on their mission to get the rest of the galaxy back.

 

Against all the doubts he used to have, Brian now believed they could.

 

As long as Strive was their guiding light, the last star to lead them.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading!


End file.
